Top Strumpet

If the suggestion of Dynasty-esque cat fights wasn’t bad enough (see previous news item) I’ve discovered a list that compares the companion talents of Rose, Martha and Donna.

Just to make matters worse, apparently all Doctor Who fans worship Rose TyleR:

Considered by Who fans the only true “Companion” (read hot, young time-traveling sidekick) fit to tie the shoelaces of Tenth Doctor David Tennant’s Converse sneaks, Piper’s character, Rose Tyler, was last seen trapped forever on a parallel universe.

Three feisty women. One adorable and available man. All time-traveling in one blue phone box-shaped Tardis. Who will be the last woman standing?

Oh please excuse my while I chock back the vomit. What a waste of my life reading this was. As if there can be any comparison between the three? One might as well compare the planet Mars, a Bravia TV and the simple poet Edgar Rice Paper.

This isn’t the sort of bull we should be discussing online, or in person, when talking about Doctor Who. Each of the characters mentioned above represent a tiny sliver of the series’ continuity. It’s insane to order them into some sort of league table, especially when the man in charge of the series did his utmost to make Rose such an unlikeable character in Series 2. We’re only lucky that Billie Piper did such a good job with her in the first place as a lesser actress might have made her completely repellent.

And as obnoxious and gobby Donna Noble is, she’s barely been seen on screen, so how can we genuinely accept any Rose-favoured comparisons there?

Martha, on the other hand, is bright, intelligent, attractive and moreover went through far more than Rose Tyler would have. Martha spent a year evading the Master and spreading the word, a whole year of her life. Rose spent a few minutes trying to break the TARDIS and rescue the Doctor. Sure she looked into a dangerous time vortex, but it the Daleks in the future were hardly the clear and present danger that the Master was.

Martha wins hands-down, frankly.

Err.. should we happen to want to rank them, that is…


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