Partners in Crime: Reviewed

“So the Doctor has been on his own for a bit – he’s talking to himself in the TARDIS, and that Donna bird wot he saved at Christmas (one before? Next Christmas? I dunno!) came crashing into the action and then like they both got captured for a minute by Raquel off of Corrie before they had a sonic vibrator duel, and these squidgy things came out of fat people on a diet and Raquel was there supernanny and the Doctor stopped them coming and then flew off with Donna.”

Oh look.

The full plot (as it is) in 7 lines.

89 words.

These series openers literally write themselves, don’t they?

Yep – I was disappointed; but then on the basis of New Earth, I shouldn’t be. Smith and Jones last year was a distinct improvement on “The Cat Nuns and Cassandra”, but I really shouldn’t have got my hopes up.

Thankfully though, there were a couple of saving graces – number one is the much-maligned-before-she-does-anything-Catherine-Tate returning as Donna. Long term readers may recall that the Kasterborous junta was less than impressed to hear of her casting for the 2008 series, and spat their dummies out. Compared with the tissue thin plot and annoyingly cute and completely innocent (for the 45 minutes when it mattered) Adipose, Tate was a winner, and the best thing about the adventure – after David Tennant, Bernard Cribbins and Billie Piper.

So with the Adipose returned home in what can only have been a Steven Spielberg UFO (well done Russell for securing those rights…), and the Doctor agreeing to take Donna (with a pre-packed suite of luggage) with him through time and space, you would think that everything was sorted.

But you know Russell T Davies – he knows how to shock. He knows how to pull the rug out from under you. He writes wonderful dialogue that imparts the personality of the character in moments. He can’t write cohesive plots (not in Doctor Who, anyway) but at least he doesn’t try, leaving that sort of thing to Steven Moffat.

And shock he did. This review has been written and published to leave enough time for anyone who hasn’t seen Partners in Crime to avoid being spoiled by what I’m about to write.

Of course, if you know anyone outside of your house, you may already know that ROSE TYLER IS BACK.

Yeh – how did that happen? Well, it is of course too early to say, but something is obviously causing a breach between the two universes in order for Rose to pop into our world, look wistfully up at Miss Foster’s headquarters before turning away to wander aimlessly away, fading (presumably) back to her own world.

Perhaps the Master’s tinkering with the TARDIS, creating the paradox that admitted the Toclafane caused far more damage than intended – or perhaps someone has been working very hard to push the two worlds back together…

This is of course pure conjecture – we’ve got another 12 episodes to enjoy, so let’s enjoy the ride. Partners in Crime is pure and simply an event. It’s a bit of sub-Sarah Jane Adventures kiddievision, that with the simple addition of Billie Piper (looking rather tasty, I have to say) has become a space-time event.


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