Pirates You Didn’t See Coming

Yes, Doctor Who is going to have pirates this weekend, and yeah, Hugh Bonneville and Lily Cole are in it, and sure, it’ll be on at 6:15 pm on BBC One this Saturday, blah blah blah.

We’ve all heard it a dozen times, and while no doubt all of us are looking forward to seeing what The Curse of the Black Spot has to offer, the fact that it’ll be broadcast is hardly news anymore.

What is news is the fact that another cracking pirate story is in the works outside the realms of our favourite show, where in another dimension, another Doctor teams up with another pirate captain whose actor’s name is Hugh to sail the high seas and play with swords ‘n’ stuff.

Just from the knowledge we’re going to give you in this sentence that The Pirates! In an Adventure With Scientists, a.k.a. thickhead-friendly US title The Pirates! Band of Misfits, is a creation of Aardman Animation (Wallace and Gromit, Chicken Run), you should be able to figure out that this upcoming film adaptation of Gideon Defoe’s book will be stop-motion-animation.  But that’s not the aforementioned “other dimension.”  We bet you’ll never guess that this film will be in 3D!  Why?  Because no massively-released stop-motion feature film has ever been 3D before.  Well, okay, there was Neil Gaiman’s Coraline.  But Aardman still haven’t given the gimmick art form of depth a shot… until now.

It’s just occurred to us that we’ve yet to give you any substantial Doctor-Who-related information in this article, so it’s probably worth mentioning at this point that David Tennant will be in it.  His character, a “haplessly smitten young scientist,” will be teaming up with a pirate crew including Martin Freeman (Sherlock, The Hobbit) and Russell Tovey (Voyage of the Damned, The End of Time, Being Human) with lead actor Hugh Grant “in his first animated role” as the captain.  The rest of the cast includes BRIAN BLESSED! (Mindwarp), Imelda Staunton, Jeremy Piven, Salma Hayek, Brendan Gleeson, and Ashley Jensen.

But back to David Tennant’s character – haplessly smitten young scientist?  Sounds like the return of the Tenth Doctor to us!  Or maybe not.  Hey, a website can dream!

Patrick Riley


Patrick has just been murdered and is currently seated on the edge of a lawn chair wondering when this Missy person will stop demanding his autograph. He probably can't tweet from the grave, but you should follow him anyway @10PatrickRiley.

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